Doctor Short Stuff and Madam Scarf

“Imagine a society that subjects people to conditions that make them terribly unhappy then gives them the drugs to take away their unhappiness. Science fiction? It is already happening to some extent in our own society. Instead of removing the conditions that make people depressed modern society gives them antidepressant drugs. In effect antidepressants are a means of modifying an individual’s internal state in such a way as to enable him to tolerate social conditions that he would otherwise find intolerable.”

——Theodore Kaczynski

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Welcome to applebees would you like apples or bees?

“Bees?”

“HE PICKED THE BEES!!”

*chefs angrily shake jars of bees*

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Doctor Short Stuff and Madam Scarf

I still can’t wrap my head around their convoluted logic. If you think wearing a mask is good for you, then do it. If I don’t wear one, and you want to wear one, then what is the problem? If you are truly, truly convinced that mask help “stop the spread” (utter BS) and you have your mask on, then shouldn’t you be OK? Isn’t your safety you are concerned about? Because I seriously do not, will not, nay CANNOT believe it’s about MY SAFETY. The only people who care about my safety is me, my mother, and most times my dad. If a stranger says it, it’s a lie. They know it, and I know it. Extrapolate that out into the “government” which encompasses people who have never met me, been to my house, eaten a meal with me, then that, ladies and gentlemen, is mendacity on an epic scale.

Of course it’s the never-ending BS like being “polite” (not my problem or job), making others feel “safe” (also not my problem), or “following the law” (not a law, nice try), “for the children” (that’s rich) or “not wanting to kill old people” (last time I checked I never killed anyone, but lord give me strength I fight the urge daily in these the most craziest of times). I feel like that last one makes me seem like Brad Pitt in Inglorious Bastards…but now we are just running around without masks breathing on senior citizens all thug-life.

I just don’t wear one when I go into any store. And I have gotten ZERO blow back. I see people in the parking lot of my local Chopper of Prices. Slumped shoulders, red, sweaty faces. Dead eyes. Pushing their carts, totally beaten behind those masks. I walk with a spring in my step, fully oxygenated! Smiling! I look at people in the eye and SMILE my widest, toothiest, mask-free grin. I grab my cart, sans gloves, and breeze right by the sanitizing wipe station, nary a care in the world for that pesky virus. Why? Why would I do such a reckless thing you might ask? Am I crazy? Off my meds? A thrill seeker?

No dear reader. I am none of those. I am however, a grown-ass woman. I am not obese. I do not smoke. I am not undergoing chemotherapy. Or on immunosuppressant drugs. My Vitamin C levels would make an orange swoon. I go outside, in the SUN! I glory in it’s UV rays while it activates my body to produce Vitamin D. I drink water. I eat fresh veggies straight from my garden. I avoid fast food. I sleep. I also do not watch doom porn in any amounts, which as been shown to cause brain damage. I enjoy a glass of wine or margarita (ok, maybe two). I avoid large, angry crowds with incendiary devices, rocks, bricks, or molotov cocktails, as the Surgeon General has determined fire burns and hard things hurt when thrown at you.

I have no sniffles. Or fever. Or cough. Or aches. I can smell AND taste. So, based on those things, or lack thereof, I conclude, with reasonable confidence, that I AM NOT SICK. And if I have this virus, and it has not made me sick, then I guess my magical immune system has…wait for it….DONE IT’S JOB. Who would have thought that it was possible without a vaccine? I guess miracles will never cease. Signs and wonders really, when the human body does what it was designed to do, without the assistance from some weird guy in California who looks like someone’s creepy basement Uncle.

So thank you, Doctor Short Stuff, and Madam Scarf. I am really, really OK just working this out on my own. I promise I will not seek out and breathe on anyone over 70 if you promise to stop talking. Deal?

Taken from this SOURCE