On putting potatoes up your ass

The fabled Ventura Highway is all that separates my artist loft from the beach where surfing first came to the United States. Both my balcony and front patio face the freeway at about eye level and I could easily smack a tennis ball right on to the ever busy 101. Access to the beach and boardwalk is very important to a Tourist Town such as mine and I can see one underpass from my balcony and another underpass from the patio. Further up the street are two pedestrian bridges. Both have been recently remodeled so that people can not use it to kill themselves by leaping down into traffic. The traffic, just like the spice, must flow and the elites that live here do not like to be inconvenienced as they dart about between Malibu and Santa Barbara.

Another feature of living where I live would have to be the homeless, the insane and the drug addicts that wander this particular neighborhood. The authorities estimate that there are more than 1100 homeless in and around my part of town but unless you too live in such a neighborhood, it can be hard to imagine so I’ll do my best to explain. Please humor me while I tell you what that looks like from ground zero.

Amale science teacher at Frank Allis Elementary School, Madison Wisconsin, has publicly accused the Madison Metropolitan School District (MMSD) of transphobia. Vica Steel (formerly Mark Busenbark) identifies as both non-binary and a transgender woman, and asks students to use the title “Mx.” (pronounced like “mix”) rather than Mr. or Ms.

In an open letter to the school district published in Our Lives, an LGBT Madison newsletter, Steel claims that the MMSD leadership is enacting a “transphobic policy”:

Doctors have issued a warning against putting frozen potatoes in your anus.

This comes as an increasing number of hemorrhoid sufferers have reportedly taken to the internet to seek alternative solutions to their problem instead of consulting doctors.